Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Born with this or not Born with this?

These days it seems like nobody can agree on anything. One of the many arguments are that children are born gay, serial killers, and/or rapist. I disagree. When a baby is born they are born only knowing how to cry and to breath, sometimes not even that. They are born somewhat like white, not even technically a color, white is very bland, but when say red, a base color is added it becomes pink an actual color. Now influence and babies are a lot like mixing white and red, it takes the influence of its peers and or environment to turn the white to pink. It is my belief that as a child the environment he or she lives in and the influence of the child's family is one of the many things that shape how a person will turn out. Sure, there are other events in a persons life to look at such as  sexual, physical, and or mental abuse, neglect, seeing a murder or some other crime being committed and more. The other side that is looked at is the nature of a person, which in basic terms mean that the mental state of the person is evaluated. Many serial killers are sociopaths, which is a personality disorder and has no known cure. Schizophrenia or Psychosis are other known disorders that many serial killers have. Many times the killer(s) will go unmedicated and or clueless to their disorder, and because of that it causes them (depending on the sub-type of the Schizophrenia he/she has or if it is Psychosis) to have certain symptoms, which could cause the person to kill. 

There however are different arguments other than Serial killers, such as if people are born gay. This is where many people argue. On one side there are those who say people are born gay, then there are those who say people are not born gay. I take the side that people are not born gay, however in is not necessarily a choice either. Many will argue that they have been gay since they could remember, well that may be true but it is proven that a child does not know even their own gender when they are born. Instead by age two or three they start to understand wether they are a boy or a girl. This is possibly the time in life that a person becomes confused of their gender and become 'gay'. This could come from how a baby is treated from birth to this point. If a boy is treated like a girl or is raised without a masculine role model, and only see the feminine role, they could exhibit more feminine behavior. That is not saying that everyone without a masculine role model is like this, there are many who show masculine behavior as well. Many times it is the environment that a baby grows up in and the habits the baby obtains, that shows how the baby is going to be as a child, same goes for a child to a teenager, and a teenager to an adult. It is a circle that never ends, parents pass on traits and habits to their children, and in some cases they treat their children how they were treated by their parents. An example would be such as parents that abandon or neglect their children. This make it more likely for their children to exhibit the same behavior as their parents towards their children and so on. This also is sort of how rapists are born, generally if you look at the past of a rapist you will find that many of them were molested or raped themselves as children or teens, by a family member, a friend, or even a stranger. But in many cases it is shown that they were raped by someone close to them.

In summary, children are born like white, if red is added, white becomes pink. It is not possible to be born gay, a serial killer or a rapist. Generally it is something in their environment or events that happen in their life to make them that way. There are other components that are looked at such as the mental state of the person in question. Will these arguments ever be put to rest? Probably not, even if it is scientifically proven and people like myself are proved wrong. There will always be arguing about subject such as if a person is born a certain way, it's just how society today works.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

I love Shane Daniel Miller

I love Shane Daniel Miller more than life itself. He is the cheese to my macaroni, I cannot wait to be Mrs.Cheyenne Miller, and to be able to start our lives together. He makes me happy. I love it when he sends me sweet text messages or emails, or tells me sweet things, they make me smile like a little school girl. He gives me butterflies when he talks to me, or whenever I am about to see him, he just simply makes me happy.

Currently I'm trying to figure out wedding things, whether or not it would be good to get married now in December, or in March or May, I've gotten advice from everyone, and most of what people told me was to have a savings, and to get a car, and to have things like that, it helps so there wont be so much stress on the two of us. I understand that, and yes that would be great things to have. But I don't know its something that Shane and I have to talk about and to plan out together.

I'm so excited, I will be able to see Shane in 15 days <3 I'm so excited I haven't got to see him since September and October! I really cannot wait. When I get to be in his arms and to kiss him, I will feel complete again, He'll be here December 20th through January 4th, and I tell you saying goodbye is going to be so hard, I'm most likely going to cry. I hate that he has to leave and he can't stay, its horrible to have to walk away while he gets on that bus. My heart breaks when he has to leave. I cannot wait till the day that he doesn't have to leave, that I don't have to not see him for months at a time, thats what's hard, thats what I hate. I wanna wake up next to him every single morning, I wanna fall asleep in his arms every single night. I love him so extremely much that to explain it is so hard because well i suck at explaining how I feel. All I can say that love is an amazing feeling sometimes, I mean yeah love has some really hard times, and it can really suck, but its when he kisses me goodnight or when he holds my hand, acts romantic, all the good things, that good feeling of love trumps over all the bad feelings. I will never ever tell anyone that love is easy cause its not, it takes a lot of work, it changes you. I will also never say that a long distance relationship is easy either, it sucks, its really really hard.

I am happy that Shane and I have been together for 6 months and soon to be 7 months on the 28th of December. I am excited!

Well, I think its time for me to start relaxing and getting ready for tomorrow and for work. I love ya and I will talk to you all soon!


Friday, November 26, 2010


I was thinking,

I really cannot wait till the 20th of December, I get to see Shane. He finally bought me an engagement ring which of corse is going to be most likely a wedding ring too. We are going to get married next month. Just a court house wedding, but we will be starting to plan for an actual wedding soon too. I'm excited I'll be Mrs. Cheyenne Miller next month and I am nervous and excited and scared and so many different emotions. I don't know how to be a good wife, I'm so scared that I'm going to mess it up because I'm a bad wife. If anyone has any advice for me please let me know I would appreciate it so extremely much. No please don't get butt hurt if you are not invited to this wedding, this is something that nobody really is invited to, Shane and I are going to be having a wedding soon and I will send out invites when things are being planned. So please when it happens and I post on my facebook that I'm married, please don't get all angry at me and flip your lids. Please understand that I am having an actual wedding, just not right at this moment.

But anyways, yeah Shane told me last night that he got me a ring, he told me that he has something special planned too. Now I'm not sure what is going to happen with the something special planned, I also don't know what my ring looks like. That is a good thing it makes for a beautiful surprise. I'm sure whatever he got is going to be amazing and I will love it.

I love Shane's little sister Shannon, she is such a sweetheart, every time she posts something on my facebook, I smile because I think thats soon going to be my new little sister. She calls herself my little sister, and I call myself her big sister. I'm so excited to be getting more family. I worry because I haven't met any of them in person, that when they officially meet me in person that they won't like me. I hope they do, because I already love them all! I know how much all Shane's brothers and sisters mean to him and I am so happy that I'll be able to meet them soon.

So I really should be getting ready to go to sleep, but I am not tired yet, I think it's because I miss Shane, today was a hard day with missing him. I'm probably going to fall asleep cuddling with a pillow, I got to fall asleep with him on Skype last night, but as happy as I get when I can do that, Its nothing compared to falling asleep in his arms. Just the feeling I get when his arms are around me and I'm asleep, him being totally relaxed and me as well, its amazing. Nobody will truly understand that feeling unless you are or have been in love. Its magical.

Well you guys, I thinks its time to try to call my hunny and then its off to bed I have work at 11, so I have to get up at 9 which is technically sleeping in for me seeing as I've been getting up at 6:50 am every morning.

So until next time,
Cheyenne (soon to be) Miller

Things I'm thankful for

Things that I am thankful for
(Sorry I'm a day late but I was to busy yesterday)

1. My Family- they are amazing, this includes my extended and soon to be added family (Shane's Family). I love them all, they are there for me all the time, no matter what, as much as I may have drama in my family and I complain about them, I will always love them no matter what!

2. My Fiancee Shane- He treats me like a Queen, I love him so extremely much, he's there for me even when I mess up, He is amazing and what I'd do without him I don't even know!

3. My job- I'm thankful for having a job in an economy like this having a job is really difficult.

4. My beliefs- I am thankful for my own beliefs and the freedom to believe in them. 

5. Thanksgiving- To be able to spend time with my family and to be able to share such an amazing dinner with them.

6. And last- I am thankful for everything in my life good and bad.

Until next time,

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Jack The Ripper

Today's blog is going to be about Jack the Ripper,

This is because everybody thinks I'm disgusting and has issues because I don't find his crimes disgusting. I'm sorry I don't get grossed out by someone talking about a serial killer who used to butcher his victims and take out the organs. I'm sorry that doesn't repulse me in any way. I mean I know it was wrong and horrible to do, but I do not think it is disgusting. I hate that I can't talk to anyone about what I have learned because it grosses them out. I guess I'm going to vent about this and then talk about Jack the Ripper because I will feel better if I get everything off my chest, then to keep it in.

What I wanted to say before everyone flipped the cuss out on me for talking about it was that, Jack the Ripper's last victim Mary Jane Kelly was butchered like the rest of his victims, he took her organs out as well, however what makes her different was the fact that her heart was missing, and never found. Nobody knows what happened to it, after she was murdered Jack the Ripper disappeared basically into the darkness of London and never was seen or heard from again.

If you can't read that without cringing in fear or disgust, don't tell me that I'm sick for wanting to learn about it, or don't call me disturbed or tell me I have issues. It's nothing close to half the horror films I've seen only this is real life. Don't judge me because of my interests.

Jack the Ripper was one of London's most infamous serial killers. The case is unsolved because it was committed in the late 1800's and nobody could get a real description of him. The of course they didn't have DNA evidence, or any of that cool stuff they have now in days, so mainly they based their cases on material evidence and confessions. Jack the Ripper set the way for Serial killers in more modern times. He was basically a sick role model who people like himself looked up to. Jack the Ripper killed only prostitutes, no children or people he considered innocent, he truly believed that he was ridding the world of the scum, which was the same mind set that Gary Ridgway the Green River murder. He to would kill prostitutes, he however left his bodies near Green River in Washington State, while Jack the Ripper would leave his victims on the dirty London streets.

Thats all I'm going to write for now, I'll post more later when I'm not in such a bad mood, I'm sorry if you read this and was like WTF is this, its horrible. I apologize but oh well I'm not writing my blogs to please you or anyone else. Its just a way I can release my feelings and not be so horrible to everyone around me when I'm in a bad mood.

Until later,
Publish Post

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

November 23, 2010

Hello everyone,

Well to start off today was a good day at work for the most part, busy more so. However, Shane made my day fantastic by sending me a really sweet text message which doesn't happened very often, it was unexpected too, which made it so much better. Went to hang out with Rachel today which was okay, then went to Cece's house and ended up leaving to go home to go and eat with my family. Well today I am going to talk about war.

I hate you, but your something thats not going to go away,

I feel that there is going to be a war again with the Koreas and we are going to end up getting involved and its going to be a mess.

thats all I have to say about that, I'm so bored that I can't even deal with myself, I'm thinking I'm either going to write or read, I haven't made my decision yet. 

How I wish life was easier, Shane would be home, I could have my perfect wedding, I'd be back in school already, I really wish sometimes that life would be so much easier. Does anyone else wish that?

I am really wanting to cook my easy chicken and pasta dish. It is so good, I should put the recipe up here when I get it, I couldn't tell you it exactly off the top of my head.

I think I'm going to listen to existentialism on prom night by straighlight run....

Sorry I had to leave to eat, 

I feel so lonely sometimes with my family, I feel so left out when my sister gain up on me and my mom and dad talk, it sucks, I really hate it.... But now I'm talking to Shane now and i feel better now. Well all I'm not feeling so good at all, so I'm going to go to bed now.

Until next time,


Straylight Run - Existentialism On Prom Night (Video)

This is the song I've been listening to, I love it!